Do you hear them?

Have you ever been around someone and after you left them you felt drained, physically and emotionally? I call those people that make you feel like that psychic vampires because they literally suck the life out of you. The same goes for naysayers, negative people, people who don’t believe in you and the likes. Recently, someone told me that they didn’t believe in my business; needless to say I was upset. And not just in an ‘Ouch that hurt my feelings’ way, but in a deep-down soul crushing way. Their not believing in me really affected me, and I must admit, still does. It isn’t easy to muster up the courage to start your own business. It isn’t easy to be your own cheerleader when no one is around to tell you ‘you’re great’. Also, recently, I had a friend and mentor tell me that she thought I could do it, that my own worst enemy was me. She said I had the intelligence and ability to have my own business and be a success. Two opposite ends of the spectrum, each with very different effects on me. However, for me to succeed, I do have to be my own best friend instead of my own worst enemy. Which, by the way, does not come natural for me; but, it is very important to have an accurate view of one’s self.

Now, how do you do that? I watched a quick video on the blog at http://www.VAclassroom.com about this very subject and there were a few points made that I will elaborate on to help you have an accurate view of you.

1. Avoid negative self-talk. I mean as soon as you realize you’re doing it, nip it in the bud. This takes a lot of hard work because negative self-talk is insipid, it whispers instead of shouts. So, be vigilant! (BTW, this is hardest for me, personally)
2. Track the progress of your employment, business, whatever it is you’re doing. Congratulate and reward yourself for every small victory, every achievement large or small. Think of a good reward too, something that really pampers you.
3. Have a mentor. I mentioned mine above, she always tells me I can do it and bolsters me up. She doesn’t lie and tell me it will be all rainbows and sunshine, but she tells me it will be okay, and sometimes that is all we want to hear anyway.
4. Every so often, take an inventory of your skills and abilities. See where you have grown, where you have developed. Track progress as a person, employee or business owner. And again, celebrate your achievements.
5. Never stop learning new skills to add to that inventory in number 4. Always be growing, trying new things, taking classes, whatever it is you are into. Going outside of our comfort zones, always helps us grow as people and grow our confidence.

Those are my thoughts on the subject, please feel free to comment or add to the list.

Until next time, blessings to you all,

Elizabeth

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